Do you have anxiety or does your partner have anxiety? As someone who has anxiety and works with people who have anxiety, here are some words of wisdom I shared with Bustle about what to watch out for when it comes to your anxiety in your relationship.
Shutting down is one of the most unproductive things a person can do in a relationship. And yet, that’s what tends to happen when you’re struggling with anxiety.
“People who tend to be more anxious […] tend to think disagreements are a bad thing,” Elizabeth Su, a life coach and relationship expert, tells Bustle. “We are often people-pleasers and worry that if we have a disagreement with our partner, it means our relationship is doomed.”
Anxiety makes it difficult to see that arguments are actually a good thing. “Usually what results is an important conversation about something that has been brewing between one of you, or both,” Su says. So try not to let your anxiety get in the way of a productive conversations.
While it’d be nice if you could snap your fingers and no longer have anxiety, it often requires a lot of effort to fix it. But by seeing a therapist, taking care of yourself, and maybe even taking medication, you can start to feel better — and avoid these common relationship mistakes, too.
