Word of the Week: Joy
Life Lesson:
In Somatic Experiencing (SE), a body-oriented approach for trauma resolution and stress management, a core tenant is orienting towards pleasure. It’s more important than ever that we practice this now.
Note: orienting towards pleasure is NOT about finding the silver-lining.
Orienting towards pleasure doesn’t mean denying your pain or suffering, but rather making room for both pain and joy. If joy feels too difficult to achieve, pleasure can also be anything that is simply less painful. I could talk for hours about SE and why I love it so much, but for now, I’ll just emphasize the importance of recognizing what feels good. It doesn’t have to be anything big or noteworthy. Perhaps it’s the sunshine on your skin, the smell of fresh ginger tea, a warm shower or catching up with your bestie. Little moments of joy are what we are going for.
Here is what brings me joy these days:
Writing class
Reading memoirs
Tarot
Not responding to emails
Talking on the phone vs. Zooming
My eye pillow
Tulips (especially the purple ones that look like stars)
Never Have I Ever on Netflix
Gluten-free brownies
Homemade kombucha
Propagating my plants
Dancing
Yoga with Adrienne
Evening walks
Social media detoxes
Tuesdays off (Elizabeth’s Day 😄)
Face masks (the spa kind)
Grapefruit Spindrift
Sleeping in
Using bright-colored pens
Grass
Listening to the birds
Quitting things
See, not doing things that don’t feel good can be just as important as doing more of what does. And what feels good today might not feel good tomorrow. So, the key is to keep tuning into your body and noticing how you are feeling about something at any given moment.
I know how tempting it is when you are stressed to try to get to the bottom of whatever is causing you to feel bad but SE teaches us that stress can also leave when we focus on what feels good.
Ask Yourself: What is bringing you even the tiniest bit of joy right now? What can you do to add more of these moments to your day?
Weekly Mantra: I am focused on what feels good.
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When in Doubt, Jam It Out!
Coming Home by Dimitri Vangelis & Wyman, Mike Perry (Follow the Spotify playlist “Jam it Out with Elizabeth” to stay up-to-date with the weekly tunes 🎵)
Things I Think You’ll Love:
For those of you who are new to Somatic Experiencing, “Waking the Tiger: Healing Trauma” by Dr. Peter Levine is a GREAT book written by the founder. This book played a pivotal role in my healing journey. I hope it opens your eyes to a new way of understanding trauma the way it did mine.
Bonus:
I’m fascinated by the concept of belongingness. I even studied the sense of belonging in a lab at Columbia. If you are also interested in what it means to “belong”, you’ll enjoy this Talkspace piece I wrote called 4 Steps to Achieve a Sense of Belonging. Read on to learn:
- Why I felt lonely even though I had lots of friends
- The connection between belonging and worthiness
- The role of intersectionality
- Three therapist-recommended resources for deeper healing
Hit reply and let us know how you are practicing joy this week! Or snap a pic of joy-in-action and tag us on Instagram @heyelizabethsu so we can celebrate with you!
xo,
Elizabeth